| Now Figwit the elf was an archer;
His talents caused others' departures.
His bow was well strung;
He had a long tongue;
His arrows, the envy of marchers.
When at Rivendell Figwit arrived
The others felt rather deprived:
His silky dark tresses
And gorgeous new dresses
The envy of Strider's new bride.
Though Figwit was scared of romance,
He demurely asked Arwen to dance.
But when she came near,
He twiddled his ears,
And befuddled, he took off his pants.
Inflatable Feathers the elf
Encountered our DUH by herself.
He gave her a squeeze,
That elf! What a tease!
He couldn't shoot arrows himself.
InDUHvidual's inflatible elves,
Do the work of a husband themselves,
Such a banging you'll hear,
If you venture near,
For the Figwits are putting up shelves.
DUH was working in the lab late one night,
when lightning struck her conductive kite,
"Figwit lives!" inDUH cried,
and 'neath the sheet by her side,
was, no, not a man! - a website.
Our brave Figwit entered the fray
With Frodo I'll go he would say
But an elf with a bow
Beat him to it you know
Figwit had laryngitis that day
By crackshot archer elf:
I shoot arrows off faster then any of the nine,
but in spite of it all my hair looks fine.
you just brush it off set!
Legolooloo pouts and just says: At least i've got lines!
There once was a lady named DUH
Who while watching the movie said "Huh!?!?
Who's that guy with the pout?
No, not Aragorn, he's out
But that Figwit he just makes me shivuh
|There once was an elf dressed in leathers
So gorgeous he angered the others.
"This elf rules supreme!"
DUH said with a scream,
"His real name's not Figwit but Feathers!"
There once was an elf, very moody,
Who claimed he wouldn't, but would he?
When put to the test,
He was found in a dress.
The question's not woody but could he?
Said Elrond, "I need to confess this!
Glorfindel, I'll give you three guesses
To guess who I found
Entwined on the ground -
Leggilooloo and Figwit in dresses!"
Though Figwit the elf never spoke
His silence great passions evoked.
Stupendous and broody
Hypnotic and moody
His beauty leaves some of us soaked.
Figwit's not much of a talker,
But Arwenelf thinks he's a corker,
She's made up a plan,
To get close to her man:-
She's the world's first OAP stalker.